It was November 22, 2001, before a quarter to midnight when the boy was ready to come to the world whether I was willing or not. It was the most challenging moment in my life. It was on holiday for thanksgiving and hence off day. Walking up with a severe abdominal pain an also at my back, I had no clue what was happening, and I couldn't sleep again. I needed to walk to the bathroom only to realize my water is breaking.
Would I be able to do this? I asked about my life. I was so much scared, and I thought I could lose my long waiting baby. Having grown in a harsh environment, I gained strength and informed my mother, who was in her bedroom. She immediately called the labour and delivery unit. The unit responded by urgently sent an ambulance.
Within a few minutes, I was transported to Hollywood Florida Hospital. The medics were very helpful to me despite yelling at them all the time. They seem to understand my situation and encouraged me. As I was wheeled to the delivery room, my family and that of my boyfriend were right aside of me telling me all will be well.
They quickly got me out of my long dress to a white hospital gown. The nurse did the prelim check speedily and went for the doctor. Suddenly, the breathing exercise has begun. I realize breathing at the time of labour is hard. Once the doctor arrived, it was time to push. It started with the first push, then second. The third push I heard a cry of my baby. The sweet call was the ever pleasing sound have ever heard. The breeze of relief waved me.
I named the boy Gregory after his father. It was a thanksgiving day indeed, and everybody was joyous and happy to welcome the first grandson. By having him, my life had to change. Motherhood changed me mentally, emotionally and also physically.
First, by being a mother, I now understand what a parent taking and mean and thus have developed love and respect for my parents and also all other parents. Being brought by parents who were emotionally, verbally and also physically abusive, I was judgmental on them. I developed a spirit of hating them.
By the experience I have gathered within the two months, which involves feeding the baby, being cried over all the time and some nights I never sleep, make me appreciate the role of parenting as a mother. It is hard indeed to raise a child, especially in the early months. Sometimes Gregory without alarm his body temperature increases and demand a doctor as the middle of the night. It has brought me having love and apprehension for mom.
Secondly, Gregory has brought a sense of responsibility. Am now responsible for wellbeing being, the health of him and a loved feeling. By bringing my blood into this harsh world, I must keep my son away from all the worlds' misfortunes as a caring mother. Now I can do anything to protect my son.
Before giving birth, I had little care of life, as nothing seemed important to me. I was a soft girl, and I nearly depended on myself. People would use me and do as they wish, my life wasn't a priority, especially when I recalled the sexual abused I had. I saw myself as a failure and worthless creature. Now being a mother, I have found confidence and strength to stand for Gregory and myself.
Thirdly, as any decision I make affects my son, my priories have entirely changed. Before him, you used to think about how to do my things. For instance, I would decide how long to sleep or how often to travel. Now my decisions changed to accommodate the needs of the new baby. Gregory has my firstborn and being my blood, too, my priorities shifted to fit his needs. Earlier, I liked hiking and travelling, which always did each weekend.
After becoming a mother, I slept most of my time in the house as the toddler is small can't be exposed to the environment changes. Gregory has changed my concern to others and the attention I pay to their needs. It has now become more and more about the baby demands and less and less about my priorities. However, I no longer miss the older moments of my wishes as I enjoy my baby's company.
Finally, Gregory has given me an inner strength which I didn't know I had. By being motherhood, it has brought some new difficulties that challenge me to be a strong lady. From carrying the pregnancy for nine months, managing the labour pains and delivering him and always looking at Gregory with a sleep of fewer than four hours makes me feel a potential mother.
For someone like me who likes comfort and rest, it's a miracle adapting all that. Apart from these achievements, I have realized that I am now more confident as a person. I don't need any approvals when doing my things, or that concerns my baby. I now love my self and whatever I do and made me recover from the devastating childhood.
Conclusion
In conclusion, it a great job to be a mother because one has to be very strong. One feels so many judgments and feels like people hate on you. Parenting is up and downs because there are many times I want to cry and hide so that I can have a little break. What you should put as a priority is what you do and the important thing. Decisions for your life are not permanent try to change such a coupe with situations. Be prepared for all kinds of mistreatment from different people but most importantly stay strong.
But the entire work of parenting, when the baby becomes grown, I believe it is entirely worth it what as a parent went through. With time, I learn how to strike patience, compassion, being useful to people, empathy, humility and selfless for my life. Taking time to reflect what things matter to me, I can proudly say that I am blessed. I can now say that parenthood is being the first time or firth time; it remains to be the best gift God has given to us.
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