According to research, birth order is believed to have a significant impact on an individual's personality. Alfred Adler is famous for being the first psychologist to bring out the theory of the difference brought by birth order. He came up with common characteristics that can be found among individuals belonging to similar birth order (McGuire, p945-972).He went ahead to emphasize how every person has a self-perceived position in his or her family. After carrying out detailed research and studying my siblings' personality and siblings from other families, I firmly subscribe to the theory of nature and birth order.
Being the firstborn of my family, I was naturally raised with a mixture of instincts and trial-and-error. My parents were book caregivers to me and raised me with a lot of attentiveness and stringent rules. Being the firstborn, I always wanted to please my parents, and this made me a perfectionist. Most people view us firstborn as conservative, leaders who submit to the authority and follow the rules. We are known for being ambitious and comforting as compared to other birth orders. According to Adler, we firstborns are more motivated as compared to late-born. Firstborns behave in a socially-expected manner and, in return, expect the siblings to act similarly (Voo, p12-18). We have considered the center of strength and, in most cases, referred to as deputy parents because whenever our parents are out, I have all the responsibility to ensure that my siblings are safe; they feed well and keep warm. My siblings always feel secure whenever I am around them, just as we do when our parents are around. During our childhood, we received all the attention from our parents and hence got to exchange more with them compared to the other siblings. We have the determination to achieve since our greatest fear is a failure. Firstborns always possess an outstanding personality, and it is easy to distinguish us from other siblings.
Our middle-born child is a boy. He is very rebellious and, at times, tend to challenge the authority. In most cases, he always has a hard time knowing his position and significance in our family. Whenever there is a disagreement in the family, he is quick to step in and help in resolving the issue. He possesses strong negotiation skills, which make him a good peacemaker. He is always challenged by my achievements and find all means that he can use to display his significance. Unlike my brother, I am much into books; my academics have been a source of joy to my parents. On the other hand, my brother discovered his talent and love for football and wentthe extra mile to sore his success from there. He never wants to be left out and thus always strives to be at per with me. Just like any other middle born child, he always wants to outdo me in terms of achievements. This order is known to go with the flow (McGuire, p945-972). As soon as our younger sister was born, my brother adjusted and learned to do things alone since the attention was shifted to the last-born child. I can't say this change has ever been easy to him since he feels like no one cares about him and that our parents never give him attention. This is the most challenging position in the family as they thinkthey are not being valued. In his routine, he never forgets to create time for himself, which he uses to discover his talents, capabilities and do self-reflection. He is never lonely because he always has an easy time making new friends.
The young siblings displaced the characteristics of being pampered, dependent, immature, and irresponsible. My youngest sister is very social, and she gets most of the attention on every family occasion. She can convince the other children or me to do things for her. She is always self-centered and feels that everything right in the family belongs to her. She is an outgoing, uncomplicated, manipulative, and great attention seeker (Gustafson, p100-102). She knows that she is neither the smartest nor the strongest, and hence she finds means to win our attention. At one point, I had a pack of sweets and needed them, so she went ahead and cleared my room and dusted my shoes since I was tired; her action was the ticket to me, giving her the sweets I had. Her room is always in a mess, leave alone locating her school uniform and where she left her sandals. She is much rebellious and less perfectionistic. Having no other sibling after her to challenge her, she has to build her self-confidence and reliance.
My aunty is blessed with one child. From my experience with her, I can testify that she is different from us. My cousin always has a difficult moment getting along with others. Having been raised as the only child, she does not know what it means to share her room and toys with others. Unlike me, who is a firstborn, she has monopolized her parent's attention and resources. Whenever we are in a family meeting, she always acts too matured for her age (McGuire, p945-972). She is a spoilt kid because she is accustomed to receiving whatever she wants from her parents, and she receives undivided attention. Other characteristics she possesses include being a perfectionist, diligent, and a leader. Her nature of growing up alone makes her the worst person to hang out with because she lacks interaction and is more of herself.
Most individuals do not conquer the idea of birth order shaping the personality of a person. Still,psychologists and philosophers have come out with various reasoning supporting this idea for an extended period. From their findings, firstborn is a perfectionist, always submit to the authority, and has high desires to succeed (Gustafson, p100-102). They can be relied on and have high chances of succeeding. Middleborns are peacemakers but rebellious to the authority and always want to outdo the firstborns. Last-borns are outgoing, pampered, dependent, and manipulative. Onlyborns are perfectionists, leaders, and mature.
Conclusion
In summary, the personality of a person is shaped by birth order since every birth order receives extra parental attention, which shapes them. Despite other researchers despising this idea, it is evident the person can easily distinguish one child from another based on their traits and finally get to know their birth order. Firstborns are ranked higher for their caring and submissive nature. Secondborns are rankeddue to their friendliness and peacemaking nature. Last-borns are ranked high for their manipulative nature. The only-borns are ranked because of their nature of looking older than their age. Birth order can be used to predict the future personality of a child yet to be born.
Work Cited
Gustafson, Curtis. "The Effects Of Birth Order On Personality." Alfredadler.Edu, pp. 2010, 100-102. https://alfredadler.edu/sites/default/files/Gustafson%20MP%202010.pdf. Accessed 29 Sept 2020.
McGuire, Kevin T. "Birth Order, Preferences, And Norms On The U.S. Supreme Court." Law & Society Review, vol 49, no. 4, 2015, pp. 945-972. Wiley, doi:10.1111/lasr.12169.
Voo, Joycelyn. "Birth Order Traits: Your Guide To Sibling Personality Differences." Parents, 2020, pp. 12-18. https://www.parents.com/baby/development/social/birth-order-and-personality/. Accessed 29 Sept 2020.
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