I am the only child in my family. My parents both work for different parastatals, holding senior positions, and could sometimes fly out of the country for days to attend meetings. So, they rarely got chances to stay home and spend family time with me. After birth, my parents employed a nanny cum-house help to be in charge of house chores while she was away. The caretaker, overwhelmed by responsibilities, never had time to even play around with the little me. Also, there were no children around to play with since people needed gate passes to move from one compound to another - something my parents could have never thought about the process even if they had all the time on earth. Usually, I spent most of my time alone, watching cartoons on television, but my situation never bothered me.
When I attained six years, I joint one of the best elementary schools for my grade one. My stay in the school lasted for five years before I later joined a high school for my secondary school program. In primary school, my teachers realized that according to Rothe (2017), I had a strange behaviour, different from all other children in my class. First, in most instances, I preferred being alone if I had the option. I also would choose to do my activities alone rather than engaging my colleagues, as other children used to do.
My father reported that the tutor in charge of my class at primary school told him that I chose to sit on a rustic desk, right from the day I got admitted into the school. Additionally, the teacher said that I showed reluctance to enjoy close relationships, and was generally emotionally cold to other children, a situation which would worry people, in reference to Bliton, Dowgwillo, Dawood, and Pincus, 2017. Despite the information, my father never took any action to seek medical intervention to my situation, claiming it could be because I grew up in a kind of isolation. Hence, my condition remained for as long as I was in elementary school. It was until I joined secondary, in my grade ten, that it dawned on me that I had different behaviour.
Whereas other students seemed to enjoy various games and activities amongst themselves, I felt like I could not get any pleasure from such engagements. Unlike others, I also showed indifference, humorlessness, and had difficulties expressing emotions, as I seemed never to notice critical remarks and praises from others. Moreover, I never reacted appropriately to the situation. That was the time when I sought to find a medical explanation for my condition.
Again, at the hospital, the doctors called my parents to give an account of my circumstance. My mother informed the medical practitioner that her later father had suffered a similar problem before he died of depression. His demise succeeded the death of an only brother, the last of his nuclear family, and the only friend and confidant he had had during all his life. She added that her uncle had once told her that her father had chosen solitary right from the days he was in school. When I shared my experience, she confirmed that they were similar to the version of my grandfather her uncle had shared with her. It was at that moment that the doctor suspected that my situation was hereditary (Gujral, Aizenstein, Reynolds, Butters, & Erickson, 2017).
From the discussion of my symptoms, the narrations on the family history, and regarding the symptoms outlined in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5), the practitioner confirmed that I was suffering schizoid personality disorder (American Psychiatric Association, 2015). With a better understanding of myself, I now do not discriminate people on the people based on their conduct. I also feel that since I'm aware of myself, it has become easier integrating with colleagues, despite the setup.
Since I was confirmed to be suffering from the disorder, I started to have a different perception of every situation me. For instance, I stopped questioning the joy people seemed to experience when they collaborated in various activities (Dammann, 2017). Though I still find challenges opening up to people as I feel I should, I at least appreciate their role in ensuring I get more interactive as before.
Currently, I attend therapy sessions in one of the best health institutions in Washington DC, known for handling such disorders. The institution focuses on simple treatment goals to suppress prevailing pressing concerns in my life. My attendant also carries out cognitive restructuring. He says that according to Bateman, Gunderson, and Mulder, 2015, the essence of the restructuring is to address thoughts that adversely affect and influence my behaviour.
Sometimes when I visit the hospital, the doctor also gives medication. He says that the medication is used to cure short-term states of anxiety caused by the disorder. According to the doctor, anxiety in a person suffering schizoid personality disorder is caused by the victim fearing other people (Martinova, et al., 2016). Therefore, the presence of anxiety is such persons implies an accurate diagnosis of the disorder. The treatment has helped me to better my relationship with others.
References
American Psychiatric Association. (2015). Depressive Disorders: Dsm-5 Selections. American Psychiatric Pub.
Bateman, A. W., Gunderson, J., & Mulder, R. (2015). Treatment of Personality Disorder. The Lancet, 385(9969), 735-743. https://doi.org/10.1016/S0140-6736(14)61394-5.
Bliton, C., Dowgwillo, E. A., Dawood, S., & Pincus, A. L. (2017). Personality Disorder. Encyclopedia of Personality and Individual Differences, Springer International Publishing, 1-19.
Dammann, G. (2017). Schizoid Personality Disorder. Psychosomatic Medicine and General Practice, 2(4), E020484-E020484.
Gujral, S., Aizenstein, H., Reynolds Iii, C. F., Butters, M. A., & Erickson, K. I. (2017). Exercise Effects on Depression: Possible Neural Mechanisms. General Hospital Psychiatry, 49, 2-10. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.genhosppsych.2017.04.012.
Martinova, H., Ganev, I., Milanova, V., Voynov, L., Vaseva, V., Kostadinov, K., & Donchev, T. (2016). Temperament Traits and Personality Disorders. Predictors for Personality Disorders. Biotechnology & Biotechnological Equipment, 30(4), 742-751. https://doi.org/10.1080/13102818.2016.1184991.
Rothe, J. P. (2017). The Scientific Analysis of Personality. Routledge.
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