Introduction
Different individuals in the world perceive different aspects in their environment depending on their good beings and circumstances in them. It is because of the varied nature in which they are treated by their fellows owing to their racial, tribal, ethnic, color, and regional subscriptions. The affected parties react by adopting corresponding adaptive measures that align with their beliefs and seen as most fitting to their circumstances. Some of them can be distorted that the corrective measures are taken after maturity when the conditions have worsened. The application of such measures might further worsen the situation, leading to disillusionment. It is a fact reflected in Nikki Giovanni's poem, adulthood. The persona who is a black girl had to undergo disillusionment after harrowing life experience. She first adopted withdrawal from reality in her bid to adapt to the existing unbecoming circumstances. She would later learn in the college and after interaction with a teacher's son that she was idealistic and had to approach life in a more way with reality. However, she further realizes that the approaches she had concocted were defective leading to her disheartening and disillusionment in the end. She could regret her failed actions in life. More particularly, what is the analysis of the worldview of the narrator in the poem titled ''adulthood'' by Nikki Giovanni, as she goes from existential crisis to idealism and finally disillusionment? They are exhausted in the subsequent paragraphs.
The Worldview of the Narrator: Existential Crisis and Idealism
The narrator views the world as too sophisticated and thus wonders where she would fit in when she grows up. In this case, she sees people around her mile about their daily activities. She is in deep thought and tries to understand when she would also be regarded as a human being of substance in this world. Due to being black, she tended to think that the surrounding considered her misfit. She found no meaning of existence as she kept on wondering whether one day she could get a chance of shinning and fitting into the society as the people around her. It can be seen that the narrator took issues as too hefty and unreachable for a black person like her. As she continued growing, he struggled to look for ways in which she could adapt to the surrounding unfavorable situations.
She resorted to withdrawal as a means to try and find her fitting most worlds. She could then be assured of solace. Little did she know that she was dragging herself into dysfunctional idealism. She tried and withdrew from all things of the real world around her. She did not want to get involved with the activities around her as she could feel demeaned in her state of self-misunderstanding. By the time, she was not herself since she could not fully exploit her full innate potential and identification with the reality of nature. She did so until when she was a teenager.
During her encounters of trying to understand the meaning and true essence of life really, she discussed with the son of a teacher as well as attended school to learn more. She realized that her withdrawn attitude could not help but was dragging her into more unrealistic nature in life. She also realized that she was on a wrong truck in her quest for true identity. She resorted to omit withdrawal tendencies and opt for the active involvement with the real issues affecting her. That is how she could truly find herself. She was committed to functioning commitments and logic. It was then that she started making progress in writing books, and lecturing about black history. She could also become happy. However, she was disillusioned when her belief that all the good people can cooperate for prosperity without bloodshed was failed. Many people were killed including Liuzzo, Kennedy, Diem, and King.
Conclusion
Cumulatively, the poem ''adulthood'' by Nikki Giovanni summarizes the journey of a black narrator in different life circumstances. She went through the existential and withdrawal, idealism and disillusionment in trying to find her true self, as featured in the prose above.
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