According to the inventory, when faced with conflict I make sure my views are expressed precisely. I also make sure they are met with equal considerations just like the other opinions expressed. Additionally, I see to it that those I conflict with understand my point and position rather than having to make them happy. I do agree with inventory results because in conflict it's a matter of being understood rather than having to please people. It is not always about a win-win situation, but a situation where one loses but is understood is better. Recently I was faced with conflict. I had a combination of a frown on my face with crossed arms and non-blinking eye gaze as was my reaction to disapproval
When in a stormy phase, according to the inventory, I enter into an active discussion where I meet the needs of others first. I do not agree with this as when I am highly angered; I prefer to have the truth known as I see it. In as much as I try to be reasonable, I often find myself wanting my needs met first. If this is not the case, I would rather calm down first before getting into a negotiation with those I conflict with. The recent interaction I had while in stormy phase, I found myself shaking my hands vigorously and pushing back the person I disagreed with.
I showed shared my score sheet with Peter, my best friend. I have known Peter for four years now. I will say he knows me as much as I know him because we share every little and big thing. Being best friends, we don't keep things to each other, so I believe we know each other pretty well. Peter agrees with the inventory on the section of handling conflicts while am on calm phase; he believes that I handle myself appropriately by moving when angered. He knows too well I make my needs known, I would find myself walking away from a confrontation that creates tension. Most of my energy is directed to devoting attention to what others feel rather than me being right.
In my calm phase, I make sure my relationship with others is not affected. Nonetheless, I make sure not to get out of limits when in a stormy phase. My aim is always to make my point known actively, and I put my ideas forward without offending anyone. I make an effort to understand others too as their point and position may be just as important as mine. Many are the times I prefer goals that I consider important instead of what others feel in the end. I, however, have to admit there are times I look at what people will think and feel as I overlook the vital goals.
There are cases where I found myself doing what had to be done in the hope that feelings would be mend later. Also, I have been in a situation where I smoothed people's feelings by doing what I considered necessary. In as much as I try to pay close attention to other feelings, I usually insist that they also pay attention to mine. In some stormy phases, I try to be as reasonable as possible without demanding full attention to myself. I do not push for the thing to go my way or to be done how I want them; instead, I push back from what others demand.
Conclusion
In conclusion, to some extent, I do agree and disagree with the inventory in my approach to adult personal conflict inventory. In some calm phases, there are behaviors I exhibit that are in line with the inventory. They agree on the highest scale be it positive or negative behavior. On the other hand, I disagree with some approach behaviors outlined in the inventory. Some approaches are too extreme while others are way too soft to be applied in real life. Nevertheless, some of the points are a good guide to conflicts approaches.
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