What Might Best Minimize a Person's Need for Closure (NFC)? Essay

Closure refers to the act of eliminating ambiguous thoughts by getting all answers concerning a specific occurrence or a situation. The need for closure is usually endless, and in most cases, it is associated with the rush to acquire the answers. According to psychologists Jennifer Harman, it is not possible to achieve closure (Harman). Harman talks of a friend who broke up with her boyfriend over the phone. Although the boyfriend clearly stated that the relationship was over, she did not believe it, and she flew thousands of miles to get closure. Even after travelling the long distance and talking to the boyfriend, she did not feel like the relationship was over because she did not achieve the most desired closure. Despite the assumption that it is not possible to achieve closure, the need for closure can be significantly minimized using various means. This paper will discuss several ways that might best minimize a person's need for closure (NFC). Ignoring ambiguous circumstances, approaching issues with an open mind, practicing decisiveness and acquiring comfort and acceptance of ambiguous situations are some of the ways that can be used to best minimize a person's need for closure.

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One of the ways to minimize a person's need for closure (NFC) is to ignore the urge for following ambiguity and clarity for specific occurrences in the aim of trying to understand another person's mind and the reasons for their actions. As human beings, we lack clarity of own thoughts and the resultant effects. This means that it will even be more difficult to understand another person's mind and why they acted in a particular way. From the case of Herman where the girlfriend did not get the closure for their breakup even after a follow-up, it would have been better if she left the situation as it was and leave the boyfriend to provide answers at will. In other words, she should have shunned her desire to know the reason behind the termination of the relationship (Harman).

People should understand that it is healthy to ignore situations that lack clarity or are ambiguous (Harman). Seeking answers will only create more unpredictable conditions without answers, and at the end, no closure will be achieved since one explanation will lead to another and at the end, a whole different situation will be created. According to Harman, it is not possible to find answers to all ambiguous situations and some needs to be ignored. Seeking for closure will only complicate one's life. More unpredictable situations are likely to arise when initial unclear circumstances are not overlooked. For example, if a woman gets a message from her partner that the relationship is over, she should ignore the details for after the crucial message is delivered. Instead of attaching any intrinsic value to the message, she should move on with life and accept the information presented without following-up on the matter to get more answers. The woman should understand that the most important aspect is the message and not the explanation. The reasons are not necessary as the message being delivered. There will be an urge to seek more answers, but the only solution will be to ignore the urges. Finding a conclusion should not be taken as a personal mission; instead, urges should be treated as unimportant aspects and at the same time cut personal commitment to getting answers.

Approaching situations with an open mind is another way to minimize the need for closure. Having an open mind approach means a person will approach situations with a room enough to accommodate new ideas without attaching prejudice or stereotypes. Such a person is more likely to be satisfied with the prevailing circumstances without pushing for more explanation as to why specific actions occurred in a particular way. On the contrary, a rigid-minded person will make judgments based on their own thinking and how they interpret the presented information. The end product of such perspectives will be misguided information that creates an urge to know more (Konnikova).

Decisiveness is another route that can be adapted to minimize the need for closure. When a person faces uncertainties and experience ambiguity, they tend to hold on the information they have at hand and subsequently use the information to make new judgments. In such cases, individuals are more exposed to bias in their interpretations creating the need for more answers (Konnikova). When making conclusive decisions concerning uncertain and ambiguous events, a person should apply determination to make quick and effective decisions. For example, a woman who gets a call from a boyfriend to end a relationship as seen in the case presented by Harman, it would be wise first to take the information and analyze before making the next step. It would be appropriate to accept the decision and end the relationship because that is the information presented. Trying to get the reasons for ending the relationship will not help since the message is clear. In essence, she should understand that seeking more information will only complicate the matter leading to more hurting. Decisiveness creates personal confidence to overcome ambiguous or unclear situations in an appropriate manner that will not generate more need for closure.

Acquiring comfort and acceptance of unclear or ambiguous situations is one of the best interventions to reduce the need for closure. When an individual gets discomfort after a particular experience, they get exposed to misjudgment followed by the urge to know more as to why certain circumstances occurred. The urge to seek answers will follow their misguided judgments in a way that will result in a focus on specific information create in their mind and misjudgments. In the example of a woman who received news of break-up, discomfort could have arisen. Such discomfort could be created through uncertainties that lead to misjudgment. She could start thinking probably the boyfriend found her unattractive or weak in some ways and the need for closure could be to know whether what she thinks is true. Instead, she could feel comfortable with her life leading to a reduced need for the exact reasons. Even if the exact reasons were given, she would still seek more closure on the matter including intra-personal closure. For example, if poor cooking was given as the reason for the break-up, she would now start asking other questions as to why it took too long for disclosure on intra-personal questioning as to why she is not good in cooking.

Conclusion

It is not possible to achieve a person's need for closure, but it can be minimized using various means. Ambiguous, unclear and uncertain situations should be ignored. Most of the answers people seek are not always important in their lives. Situations should be approached with an open mind. That way, it will be easy to accept the outcomes of various situations. People should also practice decisiveness in decision making. Decisiveness will reduce the possibility of making misguided decisions that will subsequently result in the urge for closure. Finally, people should innovate ways to acquire comfort and acceptance of ambiguous situations. People who get uncomfortable and fail to accept situations tend to look for more explanations, and in most cases, they lack correct information leading to more need for closure.

Works Cited

Harman, Jennifer. I Need Closure!" Why It Is Not Possible To Get It.. Luvze, 21 Oct. 2013, https://www.luvze.com/i-need-closure-why-it-is-not-possible-to-get-it/. Accessed 28 September 2018.

Konnikova, Maria. Why we need answers. The New Yorker, 21Oct. 2013, https://www.newyorker.com/tech/annals-of-technology/why-we-need-answers. Accessed 28 September 2018.