Introduction
Humans develop through various stages, from childhood to adulthood. Like any other person, I have experienced the life stages, and I can relate well to some of the theories developed elaborating on the stages of development, including Freud's and Erikson theories. In his theory of psychological development, Freud proposes five psychosexual stages; oral, anal, phallic, latent, and genital (Mcleod, 2019). The steps are referred to as psychosexual because, in each stage, there is some fixation of libido. As people grow, some specific areas of their bodies become crucial in giving them pleasure or as a source of frustration. According to Freud, this determines a lot in shaping individuals' characteristics. Erikson's theory focuses on psychosocial development as opposed to Freud's psychosexual focus. Erikson's argument gets centered on eight stages of development from infant to old age. This paper takes into account my development, which focuses on how Freud's and Erikson's theories of development relate to my life. I am also paying close attention to how Bandura's Social learning theory applies to my life amongst other theorists.
My childhood was a bit lonely and different from most of my peers. My father used to work outside the country, and he could only visit us occasionally. My mother would go to work every day early in the morning. Being the firstborn in the family, I had no one else to look after me. I used to hang out with the children from the neighborhood, or at times I would be left under the custody of my relatives. My early life was not as sweet as I usually see. Truly I envy some children when I see them with their parents happily going for vacations. Reflecting at my life, I used to stay alone because even the relatives whom I was left under their custody gave me less attention. I could wander around the streets, eat, suck, and put everything I could find on my way. My behavior at that age relates to Freud's argument in his first stage of psychosexual development in the oral stage (Mcleod, 2019). In the oral stage, Freud argues that the libido concentrates in the baby's mouth. Babies get satisfaction by pulling everything that surrounds and putting them in their mouths. I was such a child; I could not allow anything to pass; maybe it was because of the loneliness and the fact that I did not have an adult figure to guide me.
The distancing between my parents and me made me to develop some trust issues. My parents were not around when I needed them most. I could not get the time to go out and hang around with my dad like the rest of my friends. Erikson's first stage of psychosocial development trust vs. mistrust children develops confidence based on the dependability and quality of the primary caregivers (Cherry, 2018). My primary caregivers, my parents, and relatives were not that dependable. They never gave me the best care; they could leave me to loiter around lonely. I did not get my food on time; thus I developed a mistrust instinct. Erikson's suggests that lack of emotional care from the parents or caregivers make children develop fear and insecurities (Cherry, 2018). I was not sure if my parents could stand by me because they were never available to support me.
At an early age, I found it difficult to control my defecating behavior because I did not have anyone close to guide me. In the second stage of psychosexual development, the anal stage, Freud suggests that libido moves to the anus, and a child finds pleasure through defecating (Mcleod, 2019). Some children can observe strict defecating behavior. The adults are supposed to guide the children through the process so that they can be responsible. I faced a rough period during this age; I did not have anyone to look after me. At times I was unable to be retentive enough, and I could mess myself at times. I think that my nature of being disorganized started as early as from that stage. In the second stage of psychosocial development, Autonomy vs. Shame Erikson shared the same views with Freud. Still, he felt that at this stage, children learned how to control their bodies and develop some sense of independence in what they were doing. I was unable to control my body; I did not enjoy it, but I did not know how to control it. At this stage, Erikson suggests that children start making choices on what they want, for instance, cloth preferences and toy types. I did not have lots of toys, but I was satisfied.
Freud's third stage of development is the phallic stage. According to Freud, during this age, libido moves into the genitals (Mcleod, 2019). Children start discovering their genders and acknowledging that there is male and female. Freud argues that during these age boys begin to develop affection towards their mothers; they begin to view their fathers as rivals. Freud asserts that boys develop the Oedipus complex they feel like possessing their mothers (Mcleod, 2019). Boys start imitating their father's characteristics so that they can impress their mothers. However, at the same time, boys have fears that their fathers might discover and punish them; Freud refers to the concerns as castration anxiety. Because the girls do not have penises, they experience Electra complex. They start envying boys for having a penis. When I was around six, my dad was not around for a long time, I felt like the man in the house, like I was protecting my mother.
Erikson's third stage initiative vs. Guilt takes place during the preschool age. At this point, children start interacting with each other and socializing (Cherry, 2018). Children get opportunities to play with each other and make friends. Successful children in this stage can lead others, whereas those who do not easily socialize with others lack initiatives and start doubting themselves (Cherry, 2018). I was used to a lonely life; during my preschool level, I hardly made friends. Even if I made friends, they were just a few. I was not that good at socializing, I felt less confident, and I could not easily approach other children and convince them to be my friends. Most of the time I could take my lunch alone and go back home alone.
In the fourth stage of psychosexual development, the latent period, Freud argues that the libido becomes dormant (Mcleod, 2019). The stage takes place between six years and puberty. During this period, children concentrate more on hobbies, schools work and friendship. Children play a lot in the latent period, and they focus more on discovering new skills and making new friends (Mcleod, 2019). Above the age of six to puberty, I was playful. I liked playing video games and football with friends. I did not have many friends; I kept my circle small. Freud believes that in this stage, children get to develop self-confidence and communication skills. Freud asserts that some children remain fixed at this stage, which can adversely affect them in the future. I was not that confident during the age bracket, but at least I was able to make some few friends and also concentrated well in class. I excellently performed because I spent a lot of my time studying as opposed to my peers who were making friends.
Erikson's fourth stage of psychosocial development is industry vs. inferiority (Cherry, 2018). This stage takes place in between five to eleven years. In this stage, children start feeling proud of their accomplishments. Teachers and parents congratulate the well-doing students, and this boosts their pride. The congratulations and encouragements boost the morale of well-performing students, and that improves their confidence (Cherry, 2018). As a child, I was performing excellently in school. My mother being the closest parent, could congratulate me occasionally and tell me she was proud. My teachers as well inspired me to keep working hard. However, I felt that I did not need anyone to tell me what to do. I was a smart student, and I needed to pull excellent grades in my studies. Class wise I was a great student, but I was a bit shy in social life. I was not that outgoing, I only made friends selectively, and in that case, I did not have so many friends. According to Erikson, students who receive support and encouragement develop the strength to become competent in life, unlike those others. The support I received from my mother and teachers made me strong academically, but my social life was a big mess.
Freud's final stage is the genital stage that proceeds from puberty to adulthood. According to Freud, the genital stage arouses the inactive libido (Mcleod, 2019). Humans start developing strong sexual interests towards the opposite sex. Freud suggests that this stage begins during puberty and continues throughout an individual life. During this stage, individuals stop over concentrating on their lives and start worrying about other people's welfare. Teens can balance their ego with reality or what the society needs them to conform to. During the genital stage, individuals engage in heterosexual intercourses and enter into relationships (Mcleod, 2019). According to Freud's arguments am in this bracket. I have had several relationships. Like three, unfortunately, they have not worked out well. In some instances, I discover that we share less with my sexual partners. For example, in my first relationship, I found that we did not have a lot in common with my partner. It is challenging to form successful sexual relationships with people who have completely different desires. I have also discovered that I am not that good at balancing relationships and my school work. I prefer friends with benefits because there is less commitment. Maybe in the future, I can decide to engage in a relationship when I find someone who matches my preferences.
Unlike Freud, Erikson's psychosocial development theories do not end in stage five. Erikson's fifth stage is identity vs. confusion. Erikson asserts that this stage takes place during the turbulent teenage phase (Cherry, 2018). Erikson feels that this stage can dictate an individual's future life. At this point, adolescents start exploring and discovering. Adolescents who find intrinsic motivation and courage during this period become successful (Cherry, 2018). Those who do not see pride in themselves and remain insecure during this period become unsuccessful in the future. According to Erikson, going through this stage successfully results in fidelity; members can integrate successfully into society. During my adolescence age, I had some big dreams; I wanted to be successful in my future career and fit well in the community. I wanted to study hard in high school to get the opportunity to join the right college. I was able to attain good grades and joined college. The only part that remains a great challenge is my interpersonal skills; even at college levels, it is difficult for me to make new friends. Erikson believes that developing an ego is crucial in the identity vs. confusion stage (Cherry, 2018). According to Erikson, our ego changes as we interact with different people, the challenges that we face as humans help us shape our identity.
Erikson's six-stage of psychosocial development is intimacy vs. isolation (Cherry, 2018). This is the early stage of adulthood when humans are trying to explore their relationships. At this stage, Erikson suggests that people either commit themselves to their relationships or tend to be less committed to developing sexual relationships. Erikson argues that a strong sense of personal identity is vital in developing sexual relationships (Cherry, 2018). Confident people are more likely to engage in long term relationship. Individuals who are unable to develop intimate relationships are likely to be lonely, depressed and isolated. Narrowing down to my case, I am unable to maintain long term relationsh...
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