Bone of Contention on Gay Parenting Essay Example

Gay marriages have been a common debate in the United States and across the globe for a while now and have been considered as one of the greatest debates of the millennial era. In some countries, gay marriages have apparently been legalized, and even so in some of the states in America, but many are still opposed to the idea and cannot comprehend the thought of it (A.E., 2007).

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In studying the family, a large part of research in social science dating back decades have been able to show the crucial roles of fathers and mothers in the development of children, showing that there are negative educational, psychological and even social effects on children who get deprived of growth in a normal home with their biological parents.

Normal families that constitute of a father, mother and their biological children. In such families, mothers are subject to children preferring their mothers in situations such as seeking relief or solace from sickness, fear, hunger or any other distress that they may encounter. This is because mothers are more soothing and responsive to their children's cries, as they can distinguish the cry of pain from the cry of fear or hunger in their children. They are also more observant in noticing emotional changes, postures, gestures and so on just from looking at their children's faces. Thus, as noted from Kobak, "...children deprived of their maternal care for extended periods of their lives exhibited antisocial and hostile tendencies even as they developed into adulthood..." This shows that the lack of mothers in child development can be quite damaging to children since the role of mothers is quite crucial in establishing children's abilities in trusting and feeling safe in any relationships.

The role of fathers is also critical in that fathers exhibit distinct talents in their parenting. These are such as being the disciplinary figure and getting to challenge their children to seize life's challenges and embrace them. Fathers also act the role models to the boys as well as their presence in the home provides a sense of protection to a child. Thus, children become less fearful and more confident with their fathers. In essence, the ongoing psychological, social and academic challenges in the youth brought up in fatherless homes is demonstrative of the unique importance that fathers bring in the home for healthy and proper childhood development.

In the plight of gay parenting, it is important to note that children born in families constituting of their biological parents and bound in marriage are likely to thrive and do best as compared to gay marriage families. This is because the sense of normalcy and proper upbringing is instilled in them from birth. Also, the reason for marriage is mainly the provision of the best regarding context for the children, whereas outlined above, the fathers provide disciplinary functions and shaping of their children's competencies, whereas the mothers provide the affectionate and loving nature as required (A.E., 2007). This goes on to highlight that marriage would highly undermine the family as an institution where it is redefined, and in essence, undermine the role of society and even the children.

Conclusion

Nevertheless, there are other studies that have been carried out, and they portray that same-sex marriage and families have no harm to children. This is argued out by most gay activists that children do not undergo any psychological damage. These findings have been noted to rely on self-reports majorly, being data subjective to judgments. The major conclusion of the matter remains, as pointed out by social science research, that children do best where there is a mother to instill care and love, a father to instill discipline and direction and their children, whether biological or adopted. This can also be quoted and supported by the words of former Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger, "...absence in complementary unions, that is of the same sex, would create obstacles in normal child development which would be placed in the care of such persons, that is gay parents. The children would be deprived of the fatherhood and motherhood experience" (Association, 2005).

References

A.E., G. (2007). How does it make a difference. In Perspectives of Adults With Lesbian, Gay and BIsexual Parents (pp. 77: 550-62). American Journal of Orthopsychiatry.

Association, A. P. (2005). Retrieved from Lesbian & Gay Parenting: www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/parenting-full.pdf